Wheres my map?

I don't like taking directions from people.

Sometimes I let criticism get under my skin or I won't accept a rebuke. I guess to a degree, that's human nature. We don't like to hear what we're doing wrong and even some of the best advice we'll ignore. But I'm beginning to understand that it's necessary to listen to others, even when it might be uncomfortable for you.

I really don't know it all. I really do make mistakes. And if someone else can help, let them. Recently, I was given some advice I didn't want to hear. At first, I simply ignored it. But after a while I realized it was sound advice and the person was giving me wise counsel, so I finally accepted what they were saying.

Guess what? They were right, I was wrong.

If I would of listened to my gut, I would have egg on my face. I'd look like a major idiot and I'd try to quickly sweep it under the rug and hope no body noticed. Instead they slapped some sense into me, showed me what the right way was and I was put in my place. It kind of sucked, it was very uncomfortable for me.

But I'd rather have honest friends and wise counsel than going with my gut all the time (even when I'm wrong) and people around me who are nothing but yes-men who tell me what I want to hear.

I can take criticism. I can accept a rebuke. I'll listen to advice. And I'll certainly accept when I'm wrong. Does that mean I'm perfect at it? Fair from it.

But I'll continue to follow my map for my life and if I take a wrong turn, I hope some body is there to guide me in the right direction.

"The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice." - Proverbs 12:15

Favorites

I think we all have our favorite stuff.

Today our cable and internet went out. It kind of felt like I was living in 1939, with nothing really to do. So I thought a lot about my favorite stuff. And came up with these lists:

Favorite Movies-
5. Batman Returns
4. Bobby
3. The Passion of the Christ
2. O Brother Where Art Thou
1. Requiem for a Dream

Favorite Songs-
5. Brothers on a Hotel Bed- Death Cab for Cutie
4. Aftermath- Hillsong United
3. The Man Comes Around- Johnny Cash
2. All The Trees Of The Field Will Clap Their Hands- Sufjan Stevens
1. Bridge Over Troubled Waters- Simon and Garfunkel

Favorite Quotes-
5. "If you haven't found something worth dying for, you aren't fit to be living." - Martin Luther King Jr.
4. "Few men are willing to brave the disapproval of their fellows, the censure of their colleagues, the wrath of their society. Moral courage is a rarer commodity than bravery in battle or great intelligence. Yet it is the one essential, vital quality for those who seek to change a world which yields most painfully to change." - Robert F. Kennedy
3. “It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope.” - Robert F. Kennedy 
2. “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” - Reinhold Niebuhr
1. "Even in our sleep, pain which cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, until in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom through the awful grace of God." - Aeschylus 

Favorite People-
5. Will Ferrell
4. Johnny Cash
3. C.S. Lewis
2. Robert F. Kennedy
1. Jesus Christ

Favorite Foods-
5. Chicken fried steak
4. Fried okra (I'm like Paula Deen, fry it and I'll eat it)
3. Lasagna
2. Anything fast food (Just ask Joel)
1. Cashew chicken

Favorite Memories-
5. Summers with my grandparents
4. Graduating high school
3. Moving out
2. Baptism
1. Entering college

Favorite Things-
5. Coca-Cola
4. Bible my grandmother gave me at 13
3. Facebook
2. Macbook
1. My bed

Favorite Qualities of Myself-
5. Passionate
4. Caring
3. Sense of humor
2. Love to learn

1. Love helping people

23-years-young

The title may not make sense.

But tomorrow is my birthday and I don't really like when people say "__-years-old" when talking about peoples ages. Not a big fan of the word 'old' in general. You should of seen me when I turned 21 and I thought it was the end of my world. Joel likes to laugh at the fact that at 22, I'm already talking about the fact in a few years I'll be 30. 

Usually I dread birthdays. I don't like getting older. I would miss the good old days when I was a kid who watched cartoons on television, played games outside with my brothers and sister and whose  only worry in the world was whether mom would give me a dollar for a soda at school. Truthfully, I always dreaded getting older because I always hated taking risks and doing things to further my life.

I let my insecurities get in the way of growth and so every year on my birthday, I'd look back at the previous year and think of the time I wasted. While I'm most certainly going to reflect this year (what I did right, what I did wrong), I'm going to focus less on the lack of growth this year (because I felt I did grow) and focus more on what I can do this year.

This year has been very good to me. Evidence?

1. I finally entered into college. I did that last fall, right after my last birthday. 

2. Gained some new friends, lost some old friends. Basically I made the big decision that some people weren't really my friends, despite what they told me. They were really bringing me down and making it harder for me to grow personally. In addition, I added some awesome people. Joel increasingly became my best friend and I'm thankful for that.

3. I turned some bad situations into good situations. My mother and I got into a fight that would cost us three months apart from one another. In that time, I realized that loved ones were worth more than silly fights. I also forgave a family member despite the fact they continue to trash me and my loved ones, which lifted a heavy burden and helped me to move on from the situation while still loving them.

4. Worked on my future. College was definitely a part of that. But I spent many months thinking about my future and where I wanted to be in 5-years, 10-years, and so on. I didn't really plan much for the future in the past because I didn't really believe I could follow through with anything. Things change....

5. I became a Christian. Found a church, got baptized, began reading through the Bible daily, and I can say I finally found a taste of the relationship with God that my grandparents had before their death--something I longed for.

Today, I'm 22-years-young.

Tomorrow I'll be 23-years-old. Yes, I said it the right way this time. I'll be another year older and this year will surely be filled with my share of up's and down's. But I look forward to this year and I don't dread it at all. 

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11

Us vs. Them Pt. Two

"It is my judgment, therefore, that we should not make it difficult for the Gentiles who are turning to God." - Acts 15:19

Before I was a Christian, I was convinced of one thing. That I never really had a problem with God. My problem was mainly with Christians and I didn't think I could ever over come that. So I resisted God and church just wasn't for me. When I was in my late teens, I was some what of an aggressive atheist. It wasn't because I thought God didn't exist. It's because I didn't want him to exist.

If he existed, I thought the Christians were right. And if they were right, the world was a bad place. For better or worse, that's just what I believed. And I believed that because I felt like Christians were judgmental, arrogant, prideful, self-righteous, bigoted, ignorant, and very fake. To make things worse, I felt like they turned their religion into a castle. And that castle didn't have a bridge. If you wanted inside, you had to say all the right things and do all the right things to get in.

I remember when I was 21 years old and my grand parents had died a few months before. They were devout Christians and my only church experiences were with them. So after their deaths, I had many questions about God and the Bible. So I was invited to a church by a friend. I was so excited to go but as soon as I went there, I felt more uncomfortable than ever. It's like everything I felt about churches and Christianity was confirmed and suddenly the passion God was trying to give me was gone.

Fast forward to 2011, I've found God in my life and that passion I was searching for. I'm so thankful for that. It's been an awesome experience for me. The other day Joel wrote me a note before work that just said he was proud of my relationship with God. That meant a lot coming from someone like Joel, whose opinion I cherish. One of the benefits of becoming a Christian is joining a church that doesn't feel fake or forced. It doesn't feel us vs. them. They don't turn the pulpit or their influence into an opportunity to air their personal feelings, political views or opinions. One day recently, I listened to a pod cast of a pastor complaining about the fact that their ministry work wasn't appreciated or what they expected. They said "I'm not bitter" at least three or four times in the pod cast and each time it felt quite the opposite--they were bitter.

I'm not a great Christian or a great person. But I'm not going to sit here and pretend I am. I'm not going to build myself up, while tearing others down. I'm not going to sit on my throne and be holier than thou at the expense of others. Because I know I'm not better or holier.

As God as my witness, I don't want to make my life about "us vs. them". I don't want to pretend I love people or act phony. I want to be genuine and loving--always. I want to treat everyone with that same respect, whether they're Christian or not. Whether I agree with them or not. Just, please, don't let it be fake. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm frustrated by the Christians who kept me away for so long and encouraged by the Christians who are getting the picture that they're too blame for the fact that many people are feeling pushed away and/or running away from God and church as fast as they can.

Stop the pride. Stop the self-righteous attitudes. Stop acting holier than thou. Stop acting like your sin is less than any others. Stop using your influence for all the wrong reasons. And stop pushing people away who need God desperately, like I did. 

Evolves from North Point Church on Vimeo.

- Video from North Point Church, northpointchurch.tv